As i write this post, a deep sense of heaviness fills my heart. SUKAD Squash was over about 24 hours ago. Dunno how should I start. Playing squash for MurniNurani team has come a long way for me, and Im kinda sad tat its ends this way.
I started playing squash in the middle of 1st yr, starting fr zero. I doesnt know anything about sports tat time. That time those seniors are just much superior than me in their games, and I feel so inferior. But I continue on playing, believing tat one day i’ll be as good as them. But my game develop extremely slow, though i played everyday, about 2-3 hours. I couldnt bring my level at par with them. Many times i feel like wanna give up and quit, but somehow my heart was reluctant. I believe one day, this sport that I play will be a testimony for God.
Its only during 3rd yr tat I make it to SUKAD. We have 4 players and I was the 3rd player. But during tat SUKAD 06/07, I allow my mental weakness to supress me, and i lost to my opponents easily. As a result, my captain didnt field me in the final match. But we managed to win the silver. But deep in my heart, I knew I played badly and below my average game.
In 4th yr, they cancelled of squash fr SUKAD. I was so deep frustrated as I planned give my best games in this tournament. I soon began neglect training.
This time, I was chosen as the captain. I returned to training and try to get back my form. For the past 1 month, I practise hard, and try to overcome my mental weakness. I managed regain my confidence and improve my strokes.
When the tournament start ytd, We were pitted in group C. We won both group match and emerged top in group C. This was actually a mistake because top group C wil be facing top group B which in Jaya, the previous champion in semifinal. I dont understand why they do such a draw…
In the semifinal match against Jaya, we lost 2-1 was knocked out. In final, Jaya trashed Fajar Harapan easily. Should we hav purposely lose a match in group C, we would emerged runner-up in group C and avoided meeting Jaya in semifinal. We could hav won the silver as Fajar Harapan is much weaker than us. I feel frustrated when i thought of this. I feel like knocking my head on the wall. Last night, I cant sleep well…
I never thought my years of playing squash will end this way. I hav trying to comfort myself since last night. But wat is passed is passed. Life must go on and I hav to look forward. These 4 years of playing squash, besides the silver we won in SUKAD 06/07, many sweet and sour experiences i gained. I wil still play squash occasionally, when people invite me for a game.
Besides this, I do really hope more juniors will take up sports in campus, not just for SUKAD, but as way to live up our christian lives.
