Posts Tagged ‘Malaysia’

Who am I

This song ‘Who am I’ by Casting Crown caught my heart. A song that speaks of our human weaknesses and meakness, which also speaks of God’s wondrous grace and might. The lower and humbler we get, the greater the God in us. Grace comes when there is repentance. His strength comes when we are weak. He is the Alpha and Omega of our faith. A tower of shield in times of trouble…

As a house officer, I owiz aware of my limitations and incapabilities. But God is there, and He is owiz there. As long as we empty ourselves, He will fill us up back again…

Who am I – Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the bright and morning star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who You are

CHORUS:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling
And You’ve told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that The Eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again
Who am I, that The Voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Finally

Finally I completed this tough scary posting. In a posting where HO are fully responsible of every single details of a patient, I have been experiencing sleepless nights and nightmares of my patients collapsing in the middle of night. This is where some seniors take the chance to bully the HOs. But I do salute some who does the opposite and stand up for the HOs.

Im so thankful to God for helping me through this posting. For his grace and mercy in keeping my patients alive and well despite my poor knowledge and incompetence. But through this 4 months, I did get to really learn to become a safe and independent doctor.

Today, im in a new posting. A place where we fix and manage bones and muscles. But im getting lazier and lazier since completed my previous posting. Feel like drained of motivation and strength. Guess I used too much of it during the past 4 months. Haih….

Pray that i wil gain back my motivation and strength. 16 more months to go in housemanship….

For the sake of blogging….

Its kinda getting late, almost 11pm already. I better finish up this post and go to sleep fast. In this depart, we need to sleep early, in order to wake up in time and start our morn rounds at 6am. I began to feel ‘old’ recently. Sleeping early….

The condition in really challenging our patience. Imagine, its already almost 1 week, there was not a single pink branulla or opsite in the whole ward. I wonder what is the sisters doing. Is it the whole hospital is running low of branulla stock or is it plain laziness??? I dont understand. But this problem of low stock of equipments in the ward is really really making our job difficult and stressful.

Imagine, a patient came in with high grade fever associated with cough and SOB… We need to take blood C&S before starting antibiotics. If we start antibiotics without taking any culture, boss is gonna give us a ‘piece of his/her mind!’. But the whole ward, bottle for blood C&S NOT AVAILABLE! Geram betul…. Sometimes I just feel like knocking my head on the wall.

But what to do, this is part and parcel of being a houseman. Getting frustrated and irritated for things that are within our control… I seriously need the grace of God to keep me steady and cool in the midst of all this nonsense…

‘Traumatic PD’

I was oncall last 2 days. Tat was an eventful call, cuz i oncall with a ‘Jonah’ MO. That was this patient, referred from a peripheral hospital. 60 year old malay lady, known case of diabetes melitus, hypertension, congestive cardiac failure and chronic kidney disease. She complain of right abdominal pain with vomiting and diarrhea. The working diagnosis was, 1) Sepsis secondary to ? source, TRO Pneumonia, 2) Acute kidney injury on chronic kidney disease, 3) Underlying DM, HPT, Chronic kidney disease, Congestive Cardiac Failure. She was having spiking temperature with urea about 44.0 and ABG of metabolic acidosis.

Patient was attended by MO oncall in A&E. He then call me thru the ward and asked me to trace the PT/INR and then to do a Peritoneal Dialysis(PD) for this patient after reviewing the PT/INR. PT/INR results came back normal and I was requested to PD this patient.

So then I did the PD for this patient. I inserted the PD cathether into her abdomen. She complain of abdominal pain. Managed to run in 1 litre of hypertonic fluid. But when I tried the outflow, initially came out clear fluid, but then came out about 50-100cc of turbid, yellowish fluid with some whitish material. Being afraid of perforating her bowel, I quickly alerted the MO oncall.

MO came and see this patient. After looking at the PD fluid, he said ‘Its shit!!! And U r in deep shit!!!’ Then he said ‘Initially we planned this patient for maximum medical management, but now that u have perforated her bowels, we have to HD this patient!!!’ Now that he has tonnes of work to do, he was kinda irritated with wat I has done.

We then referred this patient to surgical, TRO Perforated viscus. Also refer to GA for Haemodialysis via femoral catheter. I got myself into writing referral the referral letters.

The following day, the surgical team came to review this patient, their impression was, TRO perforated viscua. They then planned this patient for exploratory laparotomy. Patient’s condition was optimised and then she went for exploratory laparotomy.

But, thanks to God’s wondrous grace. Post op diagnosis was appendicular abscess and pus collection over right illiac fossa. Bowel was normal!!! Patient was actually having sepsis secondary to appendicular abscess. and the turbid yellow fluid during my PD insertion was the pus discharge from the appendicular abscess.

I dunno whether I will be requested to present a morbidity review on this. But Im glad that, my so-called ‘Traumatic PD’ lead to the correct diagnosis. She is currently in ICU. Pray that she will walk out healthy….

Keeping the hope.

Today, one of my patient fell from her bed. She is a diabetic patient with multiple organ damage, and her left was once amputated for diabetic ulcer. The bed barriers wasnt up, and she was trying to reach something from her bag, when she just slipped and fall from her bed. A loud bang, and what i saw was, she lying on the floor. Quickly me and my colleagues get her up to her bed.

I was very furious with the staff nurse in charge. Feel like giving her a piece of my mind, but then I decided to hold back. What that has happened already happened, and we cant turn back time. Quickly I assessed my patient. She well orientated to time, place and person. GCS full, no headache, no vomiting and no blurring of vision. I put her on GCS chart and vital sign monitoring and ordered for skull X-ray and Cervical X-ray.  Really hope she will stay alive…

I passed over to the HO oncall. I just hope nothing happens tonight. Although it isnt my fault, but they will still hold me responsible for whatever that happens. This is how this department works. HO are responsible for whatever mistakes and errors that happened in the ward, eventhough its not their mistakes.

I hope God will keep me strong in the midst of all this troubles, and hardships. Each day problems remind us of his wondrous grace.

Going back home soon

Huh, finally finished my MCQ tis evening. Wat a relieve… But now I have to settle my CFCS stuffs and packed my stuffs to go back tomorrow night. Tonnes of work again….

I thought I can blog to whole night tonight but didn’t expect I got so much work to do. Talking about blogging, many times I wanted to post something about Malaysian Politics but Im afraid I might go overbroad and get into trouble. If I were to post something political, I have to really consider whether it is sensitive or not. I don’t want to get into trouble with the authorities. Im still young and have a long journey ahead.

Somemore I promised myself tat this blog is gonna be a blog that speaks of the wonders and glories of our Almighty Lord. (Although many times I failed to do so) There are many blogs that speaks on Malaysian Politics, just type any word related to politics on google and you will get tonnes of it. You might even get tired reading them.

Even sometimes I really get fed up with Malaysian Politics. Leader are fighting against one another and throwing accusations against each other. And the ‘rakyat’ got stuck in the middle of those fights. Inconsistent leaders making the rakyat confused. Extremist leader causing anger and fear among the rakyat.

I thought after the political tsunami, there will be a new hope for Malaysia. But this is not actually true. Both BN and opposition just can’t co-operate to make our country a better country. Who cares which party you are in, as long as you serve the people. I just hope we can do away with those unless ‘fights’

Malaysia is still far from achieving ‘Bangsa Malaysia’ but I believe this is still possible. Let’s pray for Malaysia!

Hidup ini satu perjuangan

Isu baru-baru ini, iaitu isu krisis makanan semakin hari semakin menyusahkan. Ku baru kembali dari gereja Methodist Kota Bahru. Roti yang saya beli dari kedai Muhibah di bawah gereja kini berharga RM6.50 bagi 6 keping, bukan lagi RM4.00 bagi 6 keping. Apakah kita kini terpaksa mengikat perut setiap hari? Ataupun makan maggi mee setiap hari? Habislah, kebuluran la saya! Jangan sesekali kita memandang ringan isu makanan. Walaupun ada antara kita yang tidak banyak terganggu dari krisis ini (mungkin sebab pendapatan anda mengcukupi), fikirlah golongan yang kurang berada, bagaimana mereka melalui krisis ini.

Parlimen Malaysia akan bersidang kali pertama sejak pilihanraya umum ke-12 pada 28 April ini. Isu yang paling penting dan kritikal yang patut dibangkitkan ialah isu makanan. Saya amat berharap kerajaan persekutuan bersama pembangkang dapat berkerjasama dalam hal ini. Buat sementara, lupakanlah segala perbezaan ideologi masing-masing, lupakanlah kepentinga diri masing-masing. Sama-sama kita menghadapi cabaran ini. Saya percaya, inilah harapan rakyat Malaysia.

Tanpa perjuangan hidup, hidup menjadi tidak bermakna. Tanpa fokus dan perjuangan, kita pasti kehilangan hala tujuan. Persoalannya, apakah perjuangan kita? Perjuangan untuk menjadikan diri kita lebih kaya, lebih popular, lebih dihormati atau lebih dikenali? Adakah perjuangan ini berbaloi?

Saya rakyat Malaysia, dan perjuanganku adalah untuk menjadikan negara kita bebas dari segala kesengsaraan tidak kira dari segi ekonomi atau sosial. Mungkin kita lihat diri kita kecil dan tidak mampu melakukan sebarang perubahan drastik. Namun, fikirlah jika kita semua berganding bahu membantu negara, memang kejayaan akan menunggu di depan mata. Fikirlah, apa yang kita boleh lakukan untuk negara.

Sama-sama la kita berjimat cermat, dan berbelanja dengan bijak dalam krisis ini

Roti Gardenia – RM3.00?

Roti gardenia wholegrain fibremeal kini berharga RM3.00, naik dari RM2.70. Kata peruncit kedai runcit depan USMKK, kenaikan harga ini berkuatkuasa sejak minggu lepas. Nampaknya inflasi harga barang di Malaysia makin serius, puncanya dari krisis makanan sedunia. Malaysia tidak dapat elakkan diri dari krisis ini, namun kerajaan dengan bijak cuba mengawal harga daripada terus melonjak naik. Harga barang makin lama, makin naik, namun sumbangan PTPTNku tetap static, RM7000 setahun. Nampaknya ku terpaksa belajar hidup secara sederhana, makan biar sekadar menghilangkan lapar, bukannya untuk memuaskan nafsu makan… Kurangkan makan di KFC, McD dan etc etc.

Walaupun krisis harga naik, namun jika kita lihat dari aspek lain, terdapat banyak perkara positif belaku di Negara kita. Misalnya, kerajaan kita telah berjanji memulihkan krisis kehakiman, yang hilang integritinya sejak 1988 dimana ketua hakim pada masa itu besama beberapa hakim lain dipecat. Badan Pencegah Rasuah (BPR) juga kini dicadangkan supaya melapor terus ke parlimen, ini sedikit sebanyak dapat membantu memulihkan persepsi negatif rakyat terhadap ketelusan BPR.

Hampir setiap hari apabila saya membaca surat khabar, ada perubahan aktif di Negara kita, kebanyakannya saya lihat sebagai positif. Walaupun, ramai yang mengatakan bahawa politik neagra kita masih kurang stabil, namun saya percaya, Malaysia kini mula mengorak langkah kea rah Negara yang adil, saksama dan maju.

Akan terus ku doa untuk Negara…

Tahun ini, ku dapat lagi tawaran menjadi Pembimbing Minggu Suai Kenal (PPMS) bagi sesi akademik 2008/09, namun ada sedikit halangan. Ku mesti lulus semua posting dan menganjakkan sesi elektifku 1 minggu lebih awal. Sekiranya ini dapat diselesaikan, dapatlah ku berkhidmat sebagai PPMS USMKK bagi kali ke-3!

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