SUKAD 2008/09 – Archery

It’s been some time since I last posted a blog here. Very much ‘distracted’ by many things. After losing badly in SUKAD Squash few months back, I started playing archery. With Julian as the coach, and my 2 brothers as teammate, Alex and Arvind, we started training way back 3 months ago. I know I’m taking a big risk, cause by doing this, I will have less time in studies. But I really wanna try this last opportunity to glorify God in sports. Age is catching up with me, so does time. Archery was my last shot to get a gold in SUKAD. After this, I will ‘officially’ retired from competitive sports. No more intensive training after this. Just as the bible says in 1 Corinthians 9: 24-25, “Do you know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.”
The crown that athletes won in sport is a crown that will not last. Somehow, someday, they will be beaten or their records broken. But the crown that will last forever is the crown of our personal relationship with Jesus. We live a life that glorify God, that’s the crown that last forever. That’s why in sports, we give glory to God when we win.
Our training wasn’t an easy one. It was really a strenuous time. We shot arrows everyday except when it was raining, starting around 4.30pm till around 7pm. On weekends, we trained in the morning and evenings. And most of time, especially in the mornings, I go knocking on Arvind’s door. He will show his sleepy face, opening the door. Then after a few weeks, there come the raining season for about 1-2 months. During that period, I went to district hospital, Hospital Pasir Mas for 3 weeks.
Sometimes our training was fun, all those kutuk-mengutuk and gurau-bergurau between me, Alex and Arvind was hilarious. We used to joke, saying to Arvind, ‘If he hits the bullseye, Lynn will fall in love with him.’ Hahaha! Through this hard but fun training, I develop a bonding with Alex and Arvind.:-)
Came back from district hospital in the early January, we continue our intensive training for 2 weeks before we depart to USM Main Campus together with the female team. My family prayed for me and Im very happy that my dad owiz support my course and struggle in university. Many friends sms me encouraging messages, I was very touched.:-)
We prayed together before we go for each competition. The archery competition in Penang was eventful, we leads both events, 20m and 30m,winning the gold. The women team also got gold. This is my 1st gold won in USM, an unforgettable memory.

Gold medalist

Hospital Pasir Mas

Its been a few days since I was posted in Hosp. Pasir Mas. Life here was really different than that in USMKK. Arrived here on thursday, I found the scenery here rather peaceful and quiet. There were 17 of us, 6 guys and the rest girls, one house for each. Two dutch students from Holland came and join us in this district posting. Wow, our life here will be much more interesting with their presence. The house was dirty, so the first day was all cleaning and mopping. One good thing we found is that, the previous groups left a map of Pasir Mas in our house, showing those popular food restaurants in Pasir Mas. These restaurants were also rated, imagine that? How creative they were?

The next day, we set out to check out those ‘hot’ restaurants in Pasir Mas, but unfortunately most of the reataurants are closed on fridays. We wanted to eat the ‘Lian Hong’ Loh Mee, but it was closed too. So we just settle down with wan tan mee nearby. That day was also one of our coursemate, Zie’s wedding party. Including her, there were already 4 ppl in group who are married, one of them is already a mother! I am still single.:-( So jealous of them… Anyhow the bride was so beautiful tat day. She was always pretty, but tat day was just extraordinary beautiful. We had another lunch at the wedding party and then took photos with the newly wed couple.

On day 3 which was Sat, We spend the whole day online, chatting, downloading movies. The line here was quite fast, so our computers were on most of the time. I brought my keyboard along and Viki brought his guitar. I taught Toh Jeng, my coursemate to play ‘My heart will go on’ on the keyboard and he was diligently practising it since then. Occasionally his gf (who is also our groupmate) will drop by listen to him playing. How sweet…:-)

Yesterday, was just the usual briefing, running in the wards, doing procedures. We are supposed to go Barkas in the evening, to do some research on the water in Kelantan but due to technical error, the trip was postponed. Tis morning, I went to the Labour room, and there was this patient, 28 year old female, gravida 2, para 1, about to give birth to her second child. No painkiller was given to her. Her active phase of labour was long and she was having difficulty pushing her baby down. Possibly due to her short contraction pain. It took almost 1 hour before finally the the baby’s head came out. Here in Pasir Mas, unlike HUSM, they dont give painkiller to pregnant ladies in labour. Imagine the pain they go thru? I really salute these ladies who choose to deliver in Pasir Mas.

Life here is rather slow paced, unlike in HUSM. People here are more relaxed and not in a hurry. I dont feel so much pressured here.

Mercy and strength

‘Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and grace to help us in our time of need.’ Hebrews 4: 16.

This verse struck to me as I was reading the Bible this morning. This week I gonna orthopaedic posting exams and by the end of the week, is SUKAD. Both stuffs giving a hard time this whole week. In final yr, orthopaedic posting is only 3 weeks, really not enof time for us to cover much. Especially my theory knowledge, i struggle a lot, even during our ortho posting in 4th yr.

In difficult times, we tend to use our own intelligence to solve problems rather than relying on God’s. We doesnt seek God, we figure out our own solutions. In the end, problems multiplied and worsen, we get stressed up. And then we blame God! We blame God because God didnt help us to solve our own problem (by using our own solutions). But I believe God is still faithful. He will never forsake us in times of trouble. We just need to pray n come back to Him… Learn to be dependant on Him!

What ever happens tis week, I juz hope tat it will be something tat glorifies God!

News from Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU)

I have been in NICU for bout 2 days. Its really terrible and saddening to see those newborns admitted to NICU. Some of them are jaundiced, some with breathing difficulties, some with Down syndrome and even some with congenital heart disease in failure. Some of them got ill due to maternal problem but some just got it without any reasons. Imagine you are a parent who just got a child and suddenly the doctor who delivered your child suspect your child to be Down syndrome. How do you feel? It really an agony to hear that, just like the world is crushing on you.

Today while oncall, I got to meet parents of a newborn in NICU. It was their first child, and the child was infected with multiple organism, both fungal and bacteria. The doctors suspected it to be immune deficiency and started the newborn on multiple antibiotics to cover fungal, gram positive and gram negative bacteria. The father seems to be in distress, asking me questions bout his child. But im doesnt really know the child and its problems, although the child seems stable currently. Then the father went on saying that some parents just throw their child away after giving birth but he and his wife has been trying hard to get a child. And when they finally got a child, it was not without problems…

I guess that’s how the world functions. Things that are easily obtained are owiz being unappreciated…

Recently Im beginning to accept those selfish kiasu coursemates of mine. My dad once said to me, these people are non-christians, many things they dun know and dun understand, we should pray for them. These kiasu ppl, I cant change their behavior, being upset over them is not going to do any better either… So now Im learning and trying to accept them as they are, hoping that one day they will realise wat they have been doing…

PPMS 2008/09

3 more days the new students will be coming to USMKK, still too early to expect anything yet. As preparation gets more and more tidious, Me getting more and more tired. This year is my 3rd time being the PPMS which stands for ‘Pembimbing Pelajar Minggu Suaikenal’, my last time serving as PPMS as Im already in final year. But dunno why, I feel a little demotivated… Maybe because I hav been a PPMS for twice before, motivation spirit pun merosot…

PPMS are the senior students who guides the new student during their orientation week, helping them to settle down in USM. Its owiz tiring and challenging being PPMS, handling karenah-karenah pelajar. But Im was owiz glad I was one of the few selected.

Actually this year I don’t really felt like wanna become PPMS, but I was the oni christian PPMS, so I have to carry out (otherwise no one will be doing the christian kerohanian session). So with a joyful heart, I accepted the offer. Pray tat I’ll set a good example for the juniors this year. My christian friends were like kinda worried that i might overburden doing the kerohanian session alone, but the thing that would be more burdening would be my exco work which is exco penginapan.

Being a PPMS, we hav to undergo a camp called ‘Kem BTN (BIro Tatanegara)’. We wil spend 1 week in BTN camp in Ulu Kenas. Thr we wil listen to lecture, have ‘latihan dalam kumpulan’ and night walk in the jungle. Three times I went to the same place, having the same activity. Glad tat its all over… Wat a relief… We have to undergo tiresome training just to be volunteers to serve the University and students. I wonder why…

I thank God for working miraculously, helping me to pass my paediatric posting, (because of this, I can continue on as PPMS this year, although I was reluctant at 1st) I also thank my dad for praying for me and my paediatric posting. Also my mum and sis for their support. Because of them, I’m still standing today. Memory of hardships during remedial paediatrics will owiz remain in my mind.

Nice flowers and cactus!

Heavy Cross

Oh Lord, I feel so down inside

A deep heavy feeling, So deep is the feeling

I don’t even know how to express it out

Its seems that the world is crushing on me

And no one is around to comfort me, O Lord

I don’t understand Lord, why me

Why is it me, why me,

Have to bear the burden for You

So heavy is the cross, Lord

I can’t bear it alone, I need You

Lord, grant me strength, grant me hope

That I may bear the heavy cross

To walk in Your holy path

Not only for 1 day, 1 month or 1 year

But til the day You call me home

This poem was written on 25/10/2007 – 9.30am, and posted in my friendster blogs, when I was feeling sick and lonely…

Time to heal my heart.

‘very very sorry 2 tell u tat u hv set d wrong goal frm d beginning n i nt willing 2 c u continue it as it wil make u even miserable.pls stop itLsory if I do hurt u.i hv 2 do so coz i dn’t wan d hurt bcome bigger n bigger nxt time.u think carefully n I wil nt disturb u until u r clear.sory,9.’

This was a sms I received girl was pursuing, when I confessed my feelings. It really hurts and I was heartbroken. I got this sms the second time I confessed my feelings. I have been keeping this sms for almost 2 months by now, sometimes when I read it, I feel like my heart being cut. But now I decided to delete it, to let go of what happened in past, learn to accept things as they are, and go on with life.

No doubt, this event has impacted my life to a certain extend. I get frustrated easily with just small problems, I began to bear negativism in things around me. I started to share depressing stuff over the blog. It was also around this time where I began to struggle in my studies. I was a sad, lonely and desperate guy. But in the midst of this wilderness, God’s was faithful to me. He helped me to win two medals during TOT-34. That medals really comforted my soul.

To those who happens to read this blog, please take note, I’m writing this not to talk bad about anyone here or even wanna share some depressive story. It just that I finally come to terms that it’s time I stop being miserable, sad or depressive. It’s time to rise up, and carry on with life.

Actually mainly it’s my fault, I am the one who started pursuing her. Although many times she rejected my offer for dinner or go out, I still preserve on. Now that she already found her other half, it’s time for me to give up and let go. It was really painful, and but I must do it. Now, it’s time to let my heart heal.

Hopefully, in a short while, I will be able to recover back to my original self, and continue my life as a medical student and also as a campus athlete. Livin’ 4 HIM!

Cameron Trip

TOT-34

I just got a comment tat I have been bashing and saying negative things over this blog. I started this blog to share about my experience and my friend’s experience with God. But it seems that this has become a place to vengence my frustration and anger. Well I guess this post will help…

Written on March 05, 2008, in http://tanyuethan.blogs.friendster.com/jonathans/

Hi, its been some time since i last wrote. I wanted to post a blog before i left for Temasya Olahraga Tahunan (TOT) in USM Penang last weekend but has been busy training and doing my posting work. Tis yr TOT was kinda meaningful for me personally. When i went for TOT during my 1st and 2nd yr, i didnt win any medal. Tis 2 yrs i went back, feeling sad and dejected. At times i asked myself whether shud i continue on training for TOT. Training for TOT has taken a tonne of my time and energy and finishing without medals are reali heartbreaking.

During my 3rd yr, I went for TOT for d 3rd time. There i finished 4th in 5000m, i got a medal (Tat event top 5 gets medals). Many of juniors tat time finished with gold, silver and bronze. I aimed to do better the following yr…

Tis time is my 4th TOT, i came to USM Penang with mixed feelings, one side of me wants to win, and another side of me feel lack of confidence. Tis time i competed in 2 events, 5000m and 3000m steeple chase which is on sat n sun each.

On Sat evening, i ran the 5000m. Halfway the race, suddenly i lost my focus and confidence. My pace slowed down and i only managed to finish 5th. I got a medal (since top 5 gets medals) but i was kinda disappointed with myself for losing focus n confidence. Tat Sat nite, i was feeling terrible, i got no confidence to run the next day’s 3000m steeple chase. I felt tat d results gonna be the same as 5000m.

But thank God i brought along a book to TOT. So i read tat book tat Sat nite. The book is called ‘Chang chang dao gao’ (Praying Always by Frans Baker). I was reading a part called ‘tan ran wu ju de dao gao’ which means truthful and fearless prayer. I dunno how it is related to me tat time but i jz read it and went to sleep early

The next day, sunday morning, i woke up, feeling refreshed better than the day before but thr is still feelings of disappointed because of 5000m which i din do well. But i jz took my breakfast and went to the stadium. There in the stadium, Liang Hoong and Tee Ming has jz finished their events and they won bronze each. When i heard of their good news, i lifted up my spirit. I told myself, if the juniors can do it, so do I!

Right before the event 3000m started, i looked up the sky and prayed to God, ‘Lord, pls give me the strength!’. I jz feel a new strength in me. I ran the event and finishes second! I won the silver but tat was my best run ever… Thank God for everything!